As children, we were always taught to be forgiving. When someone said "I'm sorry," our knee-jerk reaction is always "It’s okay" or “I forgive you.” An apology made everything alright. We just go right back to playing with them in the sandbox without any more thoughts about it. As we got older, we realized that it is not okay. When we get hurt, the perpetrator apologizes. It does nothing to recover our feelings, but we forgive anyway. It’s the nice thing to do.
Although saying sorry requires humility and selflessness, forgiving takes even more strength and courage. Sometimes, I admit, I just don't have that courage. Forgiving is one of the hardest things to do once you begin to really understand the dynamics of relationships. I, myself, am one of the biggest advocates of the word "sorry" when it is sincere. Given that I use apologies sparingly, I actually mean it when I say it. In my bio (to the left), it states that I rarely say sorry for the things I say, which is true. Therefore, I only apologize for the things for which I truly am sorry. When I was younger, I used sorry for everything, knowing I didn't mean it because my mom had to forgive me. Once I got into a serious relationship, I realized that apologies are not always acceptable. Although I can apologize for something and truly mean it, my significant other is not always going to forgive me. Throughout these four-plus years, I’ve had to accept that just as he knows that I won’t just forgive him at the drop of a dime.
While I am not opposed to apologies (obviously, since I use them), I just don't approve of forgiving everything. Of course, I'd want to be forgiven, but I also know that some of the things I do can be unforgivable. I can accept my apology not being accepted, as I don't accept them always myself. However, though I can forgive someone for their wrongdoing against me, it doesn’t mean that they will remain in my life.
Can you forgive and move on?